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What makes a person emotionally weak?

17 Things People With Emotional Strength Don’t Do

Life is a series of stories, and each one of us has a unique story to tell. There are billions upon billions of stories, and no two are exactly the same. If the story of your life has been filled with more sad moments than happy ones, it’s time to change that, and the best place to start is by building emotional strength

You have the power to create the life you want. One crucial skill that will help you get there is learning how to become emotionally strong. The good news is emotional strength is like a muscle: the more you use it, the stronger it becomes.

“Once you believe you are strong emotionally, you will unconsciously act stronger than before and begin to take control over your emotional whims.” –Senora Roy

In this article, you’ll learn how to be strong emotionally. Here’re 17 things people with emotional strength don’t do. Learn from these and start creating the existence you’ve always imagined for yourself.

1. They Don’t Beg for Attention

Emotional strength means confidence, and confident people don’t need to constantly be the center of attention. They’re comfortable in their own skin and are able to share the spotlight when necessary. Because they feel good about themselves, they don’t need the approval of others.

2. They Don’t Allow Others to Bring Them Down

People with emotional strength ignore the haters and the naysayers. They weed these people out and surround themselves with positive people instead.

This doesn’t mean that they don’t feel negative emotions when someone says something hurtful. They are simply able to hold those negative thoughts with love and acceptance, work through the pain, and move on.

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3. They Don’t Stop Believing in Themselves

“Somehow I can’t believe that there are any heights that can’t be scaled by a man who knows the secrets of making dreams come true. This special secret, it seems to me, can be summarized in four C’s: They are curiosity, confidence, courage, and constancy, and the greatest of all is confidence. When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable.” –Walt Disney

Soak up these amazing words from Walt Disney because belief is the most essential quality of emotional strength. When you work from a place of self-confidence, each failure becomes a lesson that continues to propel you toward a better future.

4. They Are Not Afraid to Love

“Love is the force that transforms and improves the Soul of the World.” –Paulo Coelho

People who possess emotional strength have experienced heartbreak, but it doesn’t hold them back; it makes them stronger. Just because you’ve been hurt doesn’t mean you should shut love out of your life.

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Open up your heart and embrace vulnerability. The love you find will be worth everything you go through to get it.

5. They’re Not Afraid of Slowing Down

Sometimes you need to take a step back and slow it down when you’ve been pushing yourself too hard in order to manage stress. Having drive is great, but not at the expense of your health and well-being .

When people with emotional strength are feeling overwhelmed, they allow time for reflection and relaxation in order to maintain a sense of focus and positivity and improve their mental health.

6. They Refuse to Be a Victim of Circumstance

Being emotionally strong means refusing to make excuses. Everyone is born into different circumstances and receive a different starting line in life. People with emotional strength don’t feel bad about where they’ve started; they look forward and try to find the best way to get where they want to go.

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Leave the past behind you and focus on getting a little better every day.

7. They Don’t Have a Problem Saying No

Saying no is one of the most important things you’ll ever learn how to do [1] . When you learn how to say no, you’ll make time for the things that really matter to you. Focus on your top priorities and say no to all the stuff that’s wasting your time.

8. They Don’t Back Down From Challenges

Emotionally strong people see challenges as opportunities to grow and improve their life. Challenges happen for a reason, and only when we have overcome them will we understand why they were there.

9. They Don’t Do Things They Don’t Want to Do

If you want to keep your emotional balance and sanity intact, do what you love. Get rid of baggage and commitments that are making you miserable.

People with emotional strength know that spending their very limited time doing things that make them miserable is the best way to waste their life.

10. They Don’t Forget That Happiness Is a Decision

People who have learned how to be strong emotionally know that happiness is a choice. They understand the things they need to really be happy. They choose a life of simplicity, productivity, and passion.

Furthermore, they practice gratitude in their everyday life in order to focus on each of the good things they have in the present moment. This helps them build mental strength for when they need to face difficult times.

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11. They Don’t Waste Time

Abraham Lincoln said,

“It’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.”

Mentally strong people don’t waste time doing mindless activities. They live mindfully in the present, enjoying every day as if it’s their last. They spend their time on things that are important to them and things that will help them achieve their goals in the long run.

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12. They Aren’t Afraid to Ask for Help

Every single one of the great minds in history, from Einstein to Edison, had help along the way. You can’t do it all alone, and it takes a person with emotional strength to swallow their pride and ask for help.

13. They Don’t Hold Themselves Back

Self-handicapping is a common trait among emotionally weak people. What this means is you make excuses and find ways to justify your inadequacies instead of finding ways to improve on them. If you want to change something, stop holding yourself back.

14. They Don’t Mind Working Harder Than Others

“The heights by great men reached and kept were not attained by sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upward in the night.” –Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Soak in these poetic words from Longfellow. Put in the work, and you’ll get the results you’re looking for.

15. They Don’t Overreact to Things Beyond Their Control

Charles Swindoll said,

“Life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.”

Think about how many times a day you overreact to things that really don’t matter. When you start to feel your blood boil, take a deep breath and ask yourself, “Is this really worth getting stressed out over?” Ninety-nine percent of the time, you’ll realize the answer is no.

People with emotional strength have developed a sense of mental balance that help them respond appropriately to each obstacle in their path.

16. They Don’t Settle for a Mediocre Life

Emotionally strong people don’t settle for mediocrity, even when times get tough. They strive to achieve greatness by setting goals, making plans, solving problems, and digging deep to find motivation each day.

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17. They Never Give up

Being emotionally strong means staring adversity in the face, learning from your mistakes, and living to fight another day. I’ll leave you with this inspiring quote from Harriet Beecher Stowe:

“When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.”

The Bottom Line

No one is born with emotional strength. It comes from years of struggle and working through difficult moments and emotions. People who have learned how to be strong emotionally didn’t get there because life was easy.

Learn from the points above in order to further develop your own emotional strength and fight for the life that you deserve.

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More on Building Emotional Strength

  • What Is Emotional Intelligence (And How to Develop It)
  • These 25 Strength Quotes will Unleash Your Inner Strength
  • How to Develop Mental Toughness and Stay Strong

The 10 Essential Habits of Emotionally Strong People

Emotion is the greatest motivating factor behind every action. Our emotions can drive us in any direction, including the wrong one. This is why emotional strength and stability is key to one’s overall success and happiness. The ability to overcome challenging obstacles by turning them into an opportunity for growth and development, characterizes a mentally strong being. There’s a pattern in common qualities among emotionally strong people that is apparent in the way they act and go about their daily lives. Here are 10 essential habits and practices of the emotionally strong that all people should do more of:

1. Have Confidence

Emotionally stable people radiate confidence as they walk into a room. They aren’t constantly seeking attention because they don’t need the recognition of others to know their self-worth.

2. Surround themselves with positive influences

In life there will always be things thrown our way that are beyond all control, but the people we let into our lives is not one of them. Emotionally strong people understand that the people they surround themselves with reflect who they are. Getting rid of the people that hold us back is difficult, but necessary for a positive life.

3. Forgive others

Holding grudges takes up too much mental energy. If someone genuinely apologizes for a wrong doing, forgive him or her and move on.

4. Do their own thing

Emotionally strong people aren’t afraid to be themselves. They are independent and don’t feel the need to fit in with others.

5. Believe in themselves

Those who are confident never doubt themselves. They know what they want and are optimistic for the future.

6. Show genuine kindness

Moms have been telling their kids forever that mean people are simply insecure, and it’s true. People that are emotionally strong don’t need to drag others down to feel good about themselves.

7. Willingly love

They give all of their love and aren’t afraid of getting hurt. They put themselves out there even though they know it doesn’t always work out.

8. See each day as a blessing

They don’t lie in bed dreading the next day ahead of them. Instead, they feel happy to be alive and accept every day as an opportunity for improvement.

9. Say no

In order to stay sane, it’s important to know it’s okay to say no. Over committing can raise stress levels as you try to accommodate everyone else’s needs.

10. Understand that happiness is a choice

Emotions don’t reflect reality, but instead reflect the way we perceive reality. We have the power to control our emotions and how we interpret each and every situation. A bad day can easily be turned into a good day by simply changing your outlook.

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Emotional well-being can often be over-looked, but it is just as important as our physical health. Taking on some of these habits could go a long way toward a happy, healthy approach to life.

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Being Emotional Doesn’t Make You Weak, It Actually Makes You Strong

I was always a bit more on the emotional side of the spectrum. Not that I’d always show it — like many people, I learned to hold a solid poker face — but I always felt that things affected me more than they seemed to affect others.

The most emotional people don’t get emotional for attention; they’re emotional because that’s the way they’ve always been.

They don’t choose to be emotional individuals; it’s just the way they are. And there’s nothing at all wrong with that.

We have a cultural averseness towards being emotional — or, at the very least, we dislike even appearing to be emotional. We’re taught as children that that this a weakness, that emotion should cause shame.

This is funny, no? Having feelings means experiencing the world on different levels — just like we do through sight, touch, smell, etc.

It’s taking in information from the outside world and experiencing a personal connection with it — which is in itself an experience.

People who are more emotional are experiencing life more than those who aren’t. They feel a more personal connection with their reality. They are, quite literally, living more.

Tell me: How exactly is this a sign of weakness? Weakness is found in our responses to how we experience the world, not in the depth of those experiences.

They form more personal connections with the world.

It’s one thing to sense the world around you, and it’s another to truly experience it. There is a clear distinction between the outside world and you . until emotions come into the mix.

When we experience emotions in response to things that happen outside of ourselves, we’re forming a connection to those things and to the world outside our skin.

I’m sure that I don’t have to tell you that when it comes to drive, diligence, focus and dedication, we need to believe that we are personally invested in order to achieve maximum effort. Emotions are that investment.

They’re more empathic.

One of the greatest skills a person functioning in our world can have is empathy. Empathy allows us to put ourselves in another person’s shoes, see the world through their eyes, and feel the way that they feel.

This is incredibly important, as empathizing helps you understand how other people function — why they do the things that they do. It allows us to form personal connections with individuals.

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Unless we understand empathy, we will be forever alone. Even when we’re surrounded by masses of people, we won’t feel connected to them.

They may take things personally, but they’re more passionate.

People might perceive you as weak when they notice that you feel things more deeply than they do.

But vulnerability and emotion are closely tied to passion, which is crucial to living a fulfilling life.

At the same time, passion can be your downfall.

Passion makes it more likely for you to make poor decisions. But you can learn from those poor decisions, and you will come out better for making them.

Their emotions don’t govern them; they teach them.

My passions led me down some dark roads, but I emerged ironclad, with an insatiable thirst for greatness. Make your emotions work for you, and you will be unstoppable.

There is a difference between being an emotional mess and letting your emotions control you.

Weakness is allowing your emotions to take the wheel.

The more emotions you experience — the more emotions you can better understand — the more you will learn about yourself and people in general.

But you need to be willing to learn. Don’t let your emotions govern your life. Make them work for you.

They learn to deal with their emotions so they never get the best of them.

They learn to take a step back, observe their feelings from a distance, and make better life decisions.

You must learn to differentiate between emotions themselves and the way that you react to them. People often fail to realize just how deep their consciousness is.

We don’t simply encounter the world and then experience emotions in reaction to it.

We experience the world, we experience emotions, and then we interpret these feelings before deciding how to act.

Because our feelings are so personal, we allow them to directly influence how we respond. This is a huge mistake. Emotions don’t tell you about the outside world.

They tell you about yourself. They teach you about yourself — about how certain things affect you in certain ways.

We experience emotion in order to help us better understand ourselves — to understand our strengths and weaknesses. Emotions are beneficial only if we learn from them.

But you can only learn from them if you first learn to distance yourself from them, to take a step back and become an observer.

Emotions will teach you more about you and your relationship to the outside world than anything else ever could.

But you need to approach them as an ever-learning observer, a student of life. Otherwise, they can very well weaken you. It’s all up to you.

For More Of His Thoughts And Ramblings, Follow Paul Hudson On Twitter, Facebook, And Instagram.

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